|
Post by Timelord007 on Nov 30, 2019 7:58:15 GMT
My OCD, it flares up this time of year especially when we put decorations up, people rant at me about not liking Christmas, it's not that i don't like it it's how it affects my mental health, i don't like change & the decorations trigger the OCD which triggers the depression which sets off the bipolar.
Why oh why am i cursed with this awful illness it's like a cancer of the soul
|
|
|
Post by whiskeybrewer on Nov 30, 2019 13:16:48 GMT
My OCD, it flares up this time of year especially when we put decorations up, people rant at me about not liking Christmas, it's not that i don't like it it's how it affects my mental health, i don't like change & the decorations trigger the OCD which triggers the depression which sets off the bipolar. Why oh why am i cursed with this awful illness it's like a cancer of the soul I know the feeling at times.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Nov 30, 2019 17:43:36 GMT
(Last of the Summer Wine) Clegg: Christmas comes once a year, but still we can't afford it
|
|
|
Post by aussiedoctorwhofan on Nov 30, 2019 22:46:05 GMT
It's Sunday 9:15am 1st December in Australia.. and it's bucketing down with rain... Today is the 1st day of Summer too so it should be casually in the high 30+C . Oh.. and the Vortex mag in a few hours F5.
|
|
|
Post by Star Platinum on Nov 30, 2019 23:18:28 GMT
It's Sunday 9:15am 1st December in Australia.. and it's bucketing down with rain... Today is the 1st day of Summer too so it should be casually in the high 30+C . Oh.. and the Vortex mag in a few hours F5. I'll trade you in your summer for my winter. In Ontario, we're expecting a whole bunch of snow and freezing rain starting tonight.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2019 15:57:13 GMT
Managing to do three hours of Christmas shopping and getting in and out without overspending.🤪
realising Tom Ford is over priced and that L’Occitane mens aftershave is by far cheaper and lasts six hours so far on the back of your hand while Tom Ford managed a paltry 2 hours.
|
|
shutupbanks
Castellan
There’s a horror movie called Alien? That’s really offensive. No wonder everyone keeps invading you.
Likes: 5,681
|
Post by shutupbanks on Dec 2, 2019 0:35:46 GMT
Organised a half-day off for a plumber’s visit. He said the job would take about two hours. He turned up early (I think some of us may have seen that in a movie!) and took less than an hour. Now I’ve got a couple hours free myself! Win!
|
|
|
Post by aussiedoctorwhofan on Dec 2, 2019 0:40:22 GMT
Called the surgeon this morning as per our discussion last week. He is emailing another medical certificate to cover me for the next few days. I am still not cleared to drive, still can't walk further than the letterbox and I am slowly weaning myself off the hard meds I was prescribed. And no, no BF for me this past 9 days. I can't concentrate enough. Catching up on my fluff tv shows that my wife won't watch with me.
|
|
|
Post by elkawho on Dec 2, 2019 17:57:53 GMT
Called the surgeon this morning as per our discussion last week. He is emailing another medical certificate to cover me for the next few days. I am still not cleared to drive, still can't walk further than the letterbox and I am slowly weaning myself off the hard meds I was prescribed. And no, no BF for me this past 9 days. I can't concentrate enough. Catching up on my fluff tv shows that my wife won't watch with me. What? No BF? NO wonder you need your meds! Sreiously, hope you get your strength back soon.
|
|
|
Post by elkawho on Dec 2, 2019 18:00:36 GMT
First significant snow fall of the season and half way through an 11 hour work day. We have had 10 cancellations so far and only seen 3 people. It's gonna be a looong day.
|
|
|
Post by aussiedoctorwhofan on Dec 2, 2019 20:59:16 GMT
Called the surgeon this morning as per our discussion last week. He is emailing another medical certificate to cover me for the next few days. I am still not cleared to drive, still can't walk further than the letterbox and I am slowly weaning myself off the hard meds I was prescribed. And no, no BF for me this past 9 days. I can't concentrate enough. Catching up on my fluff tv shows that my wife won't watch with me. What? No BF? NO wonder you need your meds! Sreiously, hope you get your strength back soon. Thanks! It's now Tues morning I am supposed to be back at work on Thursday.. starting to get a bit concerned now for various reasons. If worse comes to worse I will take Thurs/Fri off and spend another 2 days lying down. DOH.
|
|
|
Post by fingersmash on Dec 2, 2019 21:01:30 GMT
A three-fold day made:
1: New Who trailer. Of course. 2: The final I know is going to be the hardest to study for is canceled so we have more time to work on the term paper. 3: I just had a meeting with my professor for that term paper. She absolutely loves my rough draft and if it turns out how she thinks it will, she wants me to submit it to a couple of places for presentation.
|
|
|
Post by doctorkernow on Dec 2, 2019 21:27:52 GMT
Called the surgeon this morning as per our discussion last week. He is emailing another medical certificate to cover me for the next few days. I am still not cleared to drive, still can't walk further than the letterbox and I am slowly weaning myself off the hard meds I was prescribed. And no, no BF for me this past 9 days. I can't concentrate enough. Catching up on my fluff tv shows that my wife won't watch with me. Hello again, sorry to hear you've been in hospital Aussiedoctorwhofan. Hope all went well and I wish you a speedy recovery. I know what it's like not being able to concentrate on something you really like doing, really annoying. Hope things improve soon. Just out of curiosity, what are your fluffy tv shows? I'm intrigued! Best wishes...
|
|
|
Post by elkawho on Dec 2, 2019 23:32:41 GMT
Batwoman's Jewish!!!
|
|
|
Post by barnabaslives on Dec 3, 2019 4:22:21 GMT
Made my day: Last night I stayed at my new apartment. I'm not living under a bridge, I'm not in the hospital, and I got almost everything out of my ex's house except about four boxes worth. The Internet works if it's hard wired to the modem, I actually managed to find enough to set up the computer, I got the TV and DVD player working (I think), and I found my Dark Shadows and Doctor Who DVDs.
I took a shower at my new place all by myself after going at least another 2-3 weeks without again because now that I think I have several good helpers, they've been so busy helping me with other things instead and it's been hard to get to the shower without running into my ex. She came down yesterday because the router went out while I was unhooking the computer and I think my helpers might have talked her into giving me 2-3 more days (or not, it's not like I should trust her). They told her I wasn't very focused, lol, she'll believe that. More like I'm trying to figure out what's mine and what's hers and keep mental notes on what went in boxes that didn't even have a chance to get properly labelled so that I don't have to unpack everything to find something.
Scored a couple of cool wall hangings at a tie-dye shop so I have something to look at instead of cold, stark bare dingy white walls, and had chicken tenders from the deli for Thanksgiving instead of a frozen turkey TV dinner.
My health seems a little better aside from eating dust, been doing better walking without someone propping me up, made it through a big store propping myself up on the shopping cart, three times now.
Not made my day: Last weekend the mangy incontinent orange cat started showing signs of internal bleeding. I'm so tired of having to play games with my ex to get her animals cared for that I posted pics to Facebook (didn't name any names, I posted like I didn't know whose they were) hoping one of her friends might spot it and be her conscience. Apparently she had someone help her trap the orange cat and - I'd like to have heard what the vet said, but I've got a very bad feeling she had it euthanized just to retaliate.
Didn't get to make another trip back to her house yesterday to get the food, my helper took sick today and none of my helpers are available Tuesday. I couldn't even stay out of bed at 10:00 when she got here, let her in, found out she wasn't feeling well, gave her the day off, and slept another 5 hours I'm so exhausted and having lots of trouble breathing thanks to all the dust I ate retrieving and packing my things and trying to pack them clean so I don't get a face full of dust every time I try to unpack a box.
My slippers are so rotten I'm literally scared to wear them anymore so I'm going to in the cold to smoke in my bare feet and otherwise having a hard time finding anything I can get my feet into for socks or footwear, didn't get the food from the old place so there's little to eat until Wednesday. Couldn't get the wall hangings up yet so am starting at the stark white walls. Some important things got lost in the shuffle including my phone charger and pocket calculator (I could otherwise keep entertained working with calculations concerning ancient architecture). Took me 2 hours last night to find my medications, I though I was never going to. Would have been a horrible time to run out of anxiety medication.
New apartment is barely 2 feet wider than the bed, it's going to take a lot of bookshelves to get things unpacked and sorted because that's 90% of what I own is books. Trying to get a smaller bed and one I can pack things under but can't figure out how to order from Wal-Mart, tried to work with 2 clueless people there the other day about it and just a complete disaster. Bookshelves I bought need special assembly not in the instructions to keep from having the cardboard fake paneling not tear off, and the two I have up didn't get it so the back already tore off of one of them.
If I could keep unpacking and stacking the shelves I'd be much better, but I'm going to need help trying to go back and salvage the torn backing and trying put the rest of the shelves together (still need buy 3 or 4 more). I'm kind of cooling my heels and spinning my wheels just when it's most important to stay engaged in something to help with the major adjustment. Having a hard enough time concentrating that I really need to do something interactive, don't think it would be worth trying to listen to an audio or watch TV, and can't get anything set up so I can do music. Really trying to keep to the familiar and familiar routines as much as I can. OCD was the only guess I could get out of the psychiatrist about what I really suffer from instead of schizophrenia, I'm sure I could have told them that much.
It was pretty tough, I'm so grateful for my new helpers, they seem like absolutely beautiful people and I wouldn't have any belongings without them going so far out of their way as to help with that, but having three people at once help was about a disaster too, I can only give directions to one at a time and could't give directions to any for being out of breath from all the dust. I had to have one of them unload an entire box of my ex's stuff that they'd packed and that kind of thing, for eight hours.
Friday night my helpers were taking a couple of loads out the the vehicles and a man in uniform comes down the stair, we all figured it was the sheriff come to forcibly evict me. Turns out my mother had passed away on my last night in my home of 21 years (three times as long as I've ever lived anywhere else) and the police had come to notify me. I guess I'm just glad mom made it that long (as long as her mother) - no use crying over spilled milk I guess. I haven't even known if she was dead or alive the last eight or nine years thanks to my rotten sister.
Got kicked off a fringe archaeology board with my presentations and got told to go blog because apparently my "stream of consciousness" style of writing isn't as palatable as petty arguments and name calling, or something beyond my understanding and something about the purpose of the forum being "lively debate" like I wasn't holding up my end of that bargain. Actually started a blog but really don't know what to do with it except start over at the beginning, which is a terrible blow. Blog site has locked me out since I hooked up the computer to the new internet connection, maybe it's nibbling the wrong cookies or something.
If I could just get settled into and back to things that help keep from thinking ugly thoughts, like what a rotten deal it seems like that my ex keeps a three story house while I get to live somewhere the size of a shoebox.
Dunno, maybe it will seem more like home when I download my first new Big Finish audio here. Tried to buy vanilla incense, making the place smell like cookies is always good for housewarming, but it has a lot of sandalwood in it, lol.
At least my books feel at home, there's a library around the corner and a bookstore across the street. I could drink coffee and converse with artistes and intellectuals if I could get over my social discomfort and across the street safely.
Sorry for going on like that, but after the kindness expressed to me here the past months, I wanted to give everyone that much update on my situation.
Still getting my head around having a working shower on my floor, let alone the rest of this. :-)
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2019 5:22:57 GMT
Awesome to hear that you've got a home of your own now, barnabaslives . Just... awesome.
|
|
|
Post by aussiedoctorwhofan on Dec 3, 2019 5:31:39 GMT
Called the surgeon this morning as per our discussion last week. He is emailing another medical certificate to cover me for the next few days. I am still not cleared to drive, still can't walk further than the letterbox and I am slowly weaning myself off the hard meds I was prescribed. And no, no BF for me this past 9 days. I can't concentrate enough. Catching up on my fluff tv shows that my wife won't watch with me. Hello again, sorry to hear you've been in hospital Aussiedoctorwhofan. Hope all went well and I wish you a speedy recovery. I know what it's like not being able to concentrate on something you really like doing, really annoying. Hope things improve soon. Just out of curiosity, what are your fluffy tv shows? I'm intrigued! Best wishes...
Basically every DC/Marvel animated show. They are quick episodes, 20 mins so I can smash a whole stack in a day when not interrupted
|
|
|
Post by Timelord007 on Dec 3, 2019 7:58:43 GMT
Made my day: Last night I stayed at my new apartment. I'm not living under a bridge, I'm not in the hospital, and I got almost everything out of my ex's house except about four boxes worth. The Internet works if it's hard wired to the modem, I actually managed to find enough to set up the computer, I got the TV and DVD player working (I think), and I found my Dark Shadows and Doctor Who DVDs. I took a shower at my new place all by myself after going at least another 2-3 weeks without again because now that I think I have several good helpers, they've been so busy helping me with other things instead and it's been hard to get to the shower without running into my ex. She came down yesterday because the router went out while I was unhooking the computer and I think my helpers might have talked her into giving me 2-3 more days (or not, it's not like I should trust her). They told her I wasn't very focused, lol, she'll believe that. More like I'm trying to figure out what's mine and what's hers and keep mental notes on what went in boxes that didn't even have a chance to get properly labelled so that I don't have to unpack everything to find something. Scored a couple of cool wall hangings at a tie-dye shop so I have something to look at instead of cold, stark bare dingy white walls, and had chicken tenders from the deli for Thanksgiving instead of a frozen turkey TV dinner. My health seems a little better aside from eating dust, been doing better walking without someone propping me up, made it through a big store propping myself up on the shopping cart, three times now. Not made my day: Last weekend the mangy incontinent orange cat started showing signs of internal bleeding. I'm so tired of having to play games with my ex to get her animals cared for that I posted pics to Facebook (didn't name any names, I posted like I didn't know whose they were) hoping one of her friends might spot it and be her conscience. Apparently she had someone help her trap the orange cat and - I'd like to have heard what the vet said, but I've got a very bad feeling she had it euthanized just to retaliate. Didn't get to make another trip back to her house yesterday to get the food, my helper took sick today and none of my helpers are available Tuesday. I couldn't even stay out of bed at 10:00 when she got here, let her in, found out she wasn't feeling well, gave her the day off, and slept another 5 hours I'm so exhausted and having lots of trouble breathing thanks to all the dust I ate retrieving and packing my things and trying to pack them clean so I don't get a face full of dust every time I try to unpack a box. My slippers are so rotten I'm literally scared to wear them anymore so I'm going to in the cold to smoke in my bare feet and otherwise having a hard time finding anything I can get my feet into for socks or footwear, didn't get the food from the old place so there's little to eat until Wednesday. Couldn't get the wall hangings up yet so am starting at the stark white walls. Some important things got lost in the shuffle including my phone charger and pocket calculator (I could otherwise keep entertained working with calculations concerning ancient architecture). Took me 2 hours last night to find my medications, I though I was never going to. Would have been a horrible time to run out of anxiety medication. New apartment is barely 2 feet wider than the bed, it's going to take a lot of bookshelves to get things unpacked and sorted because that's 90% of what I own is books. Trying to get a smaller bed and one I can pack things under but can't figure out how to order from Wal-Mart, tried to work with 2 clueless people there the other day about it and just a complete disaster. Bookshelves I bought need special assembly not in the instructions to keep from having the cardboard fake paneling not tear off, and the two I have up didn't get it so the back already tore off of one of them. If I could keep unpacking and stacking the shelves I'd be much better, but I'm going to need help trying to go back and salvage the torn backing and trying put the rest of the shelves together (still need buy 3 or 4 more). I'm kind of cooling my heels and spinning my wheels just when it's most important to stay engaged in something to help with the major adjustment. Having a hard enough time concentrating that I really need to do something interactive, don't think it would be worth trying to listen to an audio or watch TV, and can't get anything set up so I can do music. Really trying to keep to the familiar and familiar routines as much as I can. OCD was the only guess I could get out of the psychiatrist about what I really suffer from instead of schizophrenia, I'm sure I could have told them that much. It was pretty tough, I'm so grateful for my new helpers, they seem like absolutely beautiful people and I wouldn't have any belongings without them going so far out of their way as to help with that, but having three people at once help was about a disaster too, I can only give directions to one at a time and could't give directions to any for being out of breath from all the dust. I had to have one of them unload an entire box of my ex's stuff that they'd packed and that kind of thing, for eight hours. Friday night my helpers were taking a couple of loads out the the vehicles and a man in uniform comes down the stair, we all figured it was the sheriff come to forcibly evict me. Turns out my mother had passed away on my last night in my home of 21 years (three times as long as I've ever lived anywhere else) and the police had come to notify me. I guess I'm just glad mom made it that long (as long as her mother) - no use crying over spilled milk I guess. I haven't even known if she was dead or alive the last eight or nine years thanks to my rotten sister. Got kicked off a fringe archaeology board with my presentations and got told to go blog because apparently my "stream of consciousness" style of writing isn't as palatable as petty arguments and name calling, or something beyond my understanding and something about the purpose of the forum being "lively debate" like I wasn't holding up my end of that bargain. Actually started a blog but really don't know what to do with it except start over at the beginning, which is a terrible blow. Blog site has locked me out since I hooked up the computer to the new internet connection, maybe it's nibbling the wrong cookies or something. If I could just get settled into and back to things that help keep from thinking ugly thoughts, like what a rotten deal it seems like that my ex keeps a three story house while I get to live somewhere the size of a shoebox. Dunno, maybe it will seem more like home when I download my first new Big Finish audio here. Tried to buy vanilla incense, making the place smell like cookies is always good for housewarming, but it has a lot of sandalwood in it, lol. At least my books feel at home, there's a library around the corner and a bookstore across the street. I could drink coffee and converse with artistes and intellectuals if I could get over my social discomfort and across the street safely. Sorry for going on like that, but after the kindness expressed to me here the past months, I wanted to give everyone that much update on my situation. Still getting my head around having a working shower on my floor, let alone the rest of this. :-) Small steps buddy small but important steps I'm proud of you, you have been treated appallingly by the system & had such a traumatic time lately, let's hope this the beginning of a new chapter for you my friend.
|
|
|
Post by Timelord007 on Dec 3, 2019 8:05:05 GMT
Received devastating news one of my cousin's who i haven't seen much of lately due to having little free time being dad's carer, well my cousin has a brain tumour which they operated on but couldn't fully remove & had drug trial which stopped it growing back.
Safly the drugs no longer work & the tumour growing again which doctor's say will eventually kill him, the only solution is radiotherapy to prolonge his life but my cousin said does he want endure the treatment if it affects the quality of life he has left?
What a impossible choice, this news flawed me & my other cousin & if that ain't bad enough my cousin wife dad may have cancer.
Gutted, heartbroken, just feel numb, helpless, angry, cheated.
|
|
|
Post by barnabaslives on Dec 3, 2019 8:07:28 GMT
Things have improved a bit in the last hours, my helper was feeling better so she came back out long enough to take me to the store. Have food, new slippers, a calculator, what I'm hoping is an appropriate phone charger, and what I'm thinking it may take to mend the bookshelf and be able to get on with getting the other bookshelves up. Decided to try charging the phone off the tower since I'm worried about cooking it with the wrong charger.
Very glad I got the calculator, that's something interactive I can do while actually laying down and resting. Also managed to get into my blog I can work on later if I'm feeling better.
|
|